i should really shut this thing off before i reveal something that is better left unsaid. but i feel like if i somehow write my thoughts out, they'll stop screaming and dancing in my head. i think it's funny that you have nothing to say to me and yet i want to tell you everything. i could tell you everything, you know. it's not use deceiving; i wish you could have a bigger place in my life. i know it's hard but i'm a selfish bitch. I'm tired of searching for your replacement. i'm so tired. i've got a whole lot of past to forgive. i'm trying to forget. and you haven't called... someone really should shut this thing off.